The other answer to all the great questions of the universe. #humor #parenting

Barb Taub

Other than 42…

Consistent:(adj.) 1. congruous; in accord. 2. conforming regularly to the same pattern, habits, principles, etc. —Webster’s Handy College Dictionary

When we became parents, everyone from Dr. Spock to great-grandmom told us, “Children need consistency.”

But after becoming a parent, I decided that consistency belongs on my list of Things They Lied About, right between “A good personality is more important than good looks,” and “Chocolate gives you zits.”

The only true consistency kids care about.

What children really need, of course, are parents with bags of money. When is the last time you heard:

  • Childrens’ Shoe Salesperson: “Here are your kid’s sneakers which will fit him for less than three months and cost more than his parents’ entire wardrobe, but at least they’re consistent. They’re also available in accord, if you go for the top of the line.”
  • Pharmacist: “And here are your pediatric antibiotics…

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